A little birdie reports that a man in India has married a dog. I just hope she got a pre-nup, because the matrimonial motive was to reverse a curse that the man caught after he stoned two dogs to death a few years before. He now suffers from paralysis and hearing loss, and friends are hopeful that his marriage will help him to atone for his sins. In the magical land of Jasonia, population: President Me, if you stone dogs to death you don't get to go near animals ever again, and paralysis is the least of your worries.